Thursday, January 31, 2008
Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve" them after they're married. If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them. In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating, to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with
a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you didn't do your homework!
There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance....
It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships.
Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention....
Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill? When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse? Which ones always have drama or don't really
understand, know, or appreciate you? The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.
Bottom line : Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, pity, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really that important.
Do you bring out the best in each other?
Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare and control?
What do you bring to the relationship?
Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain?
You can't take someone to the altar to alter them.
You can't make someone love you or make someone stay.
If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life"; you
won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.
WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG ARE:
4. A SENSE OF HUMOR
5. SHARING TASKS
6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN
7. DAILY EXCHANGES (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes)
8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS
9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE
10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF COMMITMENT
If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment withdrawal, abuse, neglect, and dishonesty; and pain will replace it....
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner:
QUESTION ..1: Do we share a common life purpose?
Two things can happen in a marriage:
(1) You can grow together, or
(2) you can grow apart.
To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life and marry someone who wants the same thing.
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust i.e. trust that I won't get "punished", or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings.
- Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis?
- Are they serious about improving themselves?
- What do they do with their time?
(1) People who are dedicated to personal growth
(2) people who are dedicated to seeking comfort
QUESTION ..4: How does he/she treat other people?
this, think about the following:
- How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as waiters?
- Do they have gratitude and appreciation?
...by Dov Heller, M.A
Monday, January 28, 2008
Monday, January 21, 2008
Work has been crazy the last 2 weeks, and I really mean CRAZY! I guess work has never been as crazy as this ever before to me for the past 7 years in the company. Maybe it's the nature of this current job that I'm in, which is very different from what I've been doing in the past, so this crazy long working hours is like...unavoidable!
In this current job, it's like "project-based". So when there's no "project"assigned, then I'll have more time, but when there's mega "project" going on, it's unbelievable...
I always believe in work-life balance and the MNC I work for also encourages work-life balance. But when you are engaged in such "project" where a lot of your work will be depending on other team members who always submit things late and pushing the timeline tighter and tighter, and end up having to work overnight without any sleep for the last few days, beating the dateline, where can u find work-life balance?
Anyway the "project" is now over, dateline was last Friday and I was practically sleeping throughout Friday afternoon & Sat. Also went to Genting with hubby & baby on Sunday, came back today since I've taken few days off from work to spend some time with family....
Before I end this post, I would like to thank Daniel who has given me the Bloggers of The World 2007 2008 Award. This is my first award since I started blogging Aug last year and I'm really really happy!
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Thanx Daniel, for tagging me, so now u passed the headache to me huh! haha...
My birth month is
Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to take things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive. Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children.